I need this.
http://www.yankodesign.com/index.php/2008/01/14/a-persian-puzzle/
Monday, May 26, 2008
Monday, May 19, 2008
The StepMonster
When I was five my parents got divorced. My father got full custody of both my three-year old sister and myself. And my mother....well, my mother got nothing. In fact, I saw my mother a grad total of 3 times between the time I was five and six-months after my 18th birthday. There were many circumstances that caused that, including my move overseas with my father who worked for the State Department. I don't hold a grudge towards either one of them for any of those years. Like so many other things, it happened, it cannot be changed, let's just move on.
Three years after my father's divorce he remarried a wonderful woman. Well, not so wonderful a the time. I have always been rebellious, and hard-headed. I used those attributes to make my stepmother's life very difficult. In fact, I was such a problem child and caused her and my father so many headaches that by the time I was 16, they couldn't handle me and sent me to live with my Aunt Caryn (she is by far the most amazing woman on this planet and deserves a post all of her) in North Carolina.
Throughout those years things between my stepmother and I were strained, but also shared some really wonderful memories. However in my heart I think I felt like I was betraying my birth mother by calling my stepmother "Mom." In every sense of the word, she was my mom. She stayed up late with me when I was sicks, came to band concerts, took me shopping for my first bra, all the things that Mom's do for their children. Still I felt like I was betraying a memory if I was to call her "Mom."
Eventually it became impossible for me not to call her "Mom." However I need someway to easily tell the difference between her (my stepmother) and my Mom (my birth mother.) So I called my stepmother, the StepMonster. Somehow I got away with calling her that behind her back for years. She never found out.
Around the time I graduated for high school and went off to college, the relationship I had with my StepMonster changed. We became closer, we got to really know one another, and created a bond that is still going strong to this day. I eventually told her about the nickname and too my surprise she laughed. I occasionally refer to her as the StepMonster only because it is an easy way to explain who I am speaking about, but it hold no malice like it used to. I can say that the StepMonster has been there for me more times then anyone else. And I love her for it.
Three years after my father's divorce he remarried a wonderful woman. Well, not so wonderful a the time. I have always been rebellious, and hard-headed. I used those attributes to make my stepmother's life very difficult. In fact, I was such a problem child and caused her and my father so many headaches that by the time I was 16, they couldn't handle me and sent me to live with my Aunt Caryn (she is by far the most amazing woman on this planet and deserves a post all of her) in North Carolina.
Throughout those years things between my stepmother and I were strained, but also shared some really wonderful memories. However in my heart I think I felt like I was betraying my birth mother by calling my stepmother "Mom." In every sense of the word, she was my mom. She stayed up late with me when I was sicks, came to band concerts, took me shopping for my first bra, all the things that Mom's do for their children. Still I felt like I was betraying a memory if I was to call her "Mom."
Eventually it became impossible for me not to call her "Mom." However I need someway to easily tell the difference between her (my stepmother) and my Mom (my birth mother.) So I called my stepmother, the StepMonster. Somehow I got away with calling her that behind her back for years. She never found out.
Around the time I graduated for high school and went off to college, the relationship I had with my StepMonster changed. We became closer, we got to really know one another, and created a bond that is still going strong to this day. I eventually told her about the nickname and too my surprise she laughed. I occasionally refer to her as the StepMonster only because it is an easy way to explain who I am speaking about, but it hold no malice like it used to. I can say that the StepMonster has been there for me more times then anyone else. And I love her for it.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
A Fork in the Road
One of my favorite bloggers has recently announced her pregnancy, and I can't express how excited I am for her. Another of my favs is expecting her third next Wednesday. And another wonderful set of parents just recently welcomed a beautiful daughter. I've been surrounded recently with babies, and people professing their desire for children recently and it has raised a few questions in my own mind.
It's an amazing, awe-inspiring responsibility to be able to bring a child into the world. And I for one know that I am not ready for that responsibility. I can't even remember where I put the cord to my camera, what makes you think I remember where I put a baby? I have no doubts that I were blessed with a child right now I would handle the responsibility. It would be difficult, and stressful, but quite possibly the most important thing I've ever done. Even with that conviction, I know that I am no where near ready.
I recently quit my job. I am in the process of looking for a new one, and I think I pretty much have one all wrapped up at somewhere very impressive. (Details will be forth coming just as soon as I am sure it's a done deal.) In addition to that, I have also gone back to school to pursue my RN. I want to help people, and feel like I make a difference. If you know me at all, you know that I don't do thing half-heartly. I am, in fact, not only pursuing my RN, I am planning on pursuing my Masters Degree as well in the same field. This is all well and good you see, but it make me wonder when will I have the time to start my own family.
You see, I want to be a nurse, and do the best that I can in that field. And doing the best requires lots of schooling. I'm willing to go through all the schooling necessary to get there. However, I know this is a huge demand on time, money and emotional resources. And with so much of me already committed to that, where am I going to find the time to make a marriage, a baby, and a family work? Do I really have to choose between them? How do we decide which part of our life should take precedence?
I'm hoping that I wont have to decide. I'm hoping that things will work out in their own sweet time, and leave me wondering why I ever began to stress in the first place.
It's an amazing, awe-inspiring responsibility to be able to bring a child into the world. And I for one know that I am not ready for that responsibility. I can't even remember where I put the cord to my camera, what makes you think I remember where I put a baby? I have no doubts that I were blessed with a child right now I would handle the responsibility. It would be difficult, and stressful, but quite possibly the most important thing I've ever done. Even with that conviction, I know that I am no where near ready.
I recently quit my job. I am in the process of looking for a new one, and I think I pretty much have one all wrapped up at somewhere very impressive. (Details will be forth coming just as soon as I am sure it's a done deal.) In addition to that, I have also gone back to school to pursue my RN. I want to help people, and feel like I make a difference. If you know me at all, you know that I don't do thing half-heartly. I am, in fact, not only pursuing my RN, I am planning on pursuing my Masters Degree as well in the same field. This is all well and good you see, but it make me wonder when will I have the time to start my own family.
You see, I want to be a nurse, and do the best that I can in that field. And doing the best requires lots of schooling. I'm willing to go through all the schooling necessary to get there. However, I know this is a huge demand on time, money and emotional resources. And with so much of me already committed to that, where am I going to find the time to make a marriage, a baby, and a family work? Do I really have to choose between them? How do we decide which part of our life should take precedence?
I'm hoping that I wont have to decide. I'm hoping that things will work out in their own sweet time, and leave me wondering why I ever began to stress in the first place.
Friday, May 9, 2008
The first rule of Flight Club....
While this blog is in it's infancy, I am by no means new to the blogging community. I've followed several blogs for upwards of two years now. (Random side note: Is it weird that I can tell you what has been happening to several individuals in the Richmond area even though I have never met them, and have no clue what they look like?) And since quitting my job, I've found that I have a huge expanse of extra time on my hands. So what's a girl to do with all that extra time?
Torture her boyfriend.
Just kidding. I think.
Spend all of her extra time sitting around reading other people's blogs and thinking about starting her own of course. And this nightly quasi-stalking ritual that I go through each night brought me up to speed on a very interesting conversation that has been going on at one of my favorite local blogs. RVANews posted an item about the recent lockdown of the University of Richmond's campus. I'm not going to get into the specifics of comments and the level to which is was escalated. If you are that interested, I provide you a link for heaven's sake, go check it out.
However, this particular argument/back and forth brought a very important question to mind for me. How do you accept opinions for other folk when you sincerely feel that you are right? You have to know the type of argument that I am talking about. You have an opinion that is radically different from someone else, and they refuse to accept or even acknowledge that you have a justifiable argument. Aggravating? Sure. Impossible? Maybe. Can it be overcome? Egh....therein lies the problem.
When are the opinions we hold so correct that we can't even accept that they are being challenged? And what are we supposed to do when we would rather smack someone in the face then listen to their dribble for another second? I personally have a problem with this. I really have to step outside of my mind and realize that someone might, (might being the keyword here) be right. But *gasp* that would mean that I was wrong.
Torture her boyfriend.
Just kidding. I think.
Spend all of her extra time sitting around reading other people's blogs and thinking about starting her own of course. And this nightly quasi-stalking ritual that I go through each night brought me up to speed on a very interesting conversation that has been going on at one of my favorite local blogs. RVANews posted an item about the recent lockdown of the University of Richmond's campus. I'm not going to get into the specifics of comments and the level to which is was escalated. If you are that interested, I provide you a link for heaven's sake, go check it out.
However, this particular argument/back and forth brought a very important question to mind for me. How do you accept opinions for other folk when you sincerely feel that you are right? You have to know the type of argument that I am talking about. You have an opinion that is radically different from someone else, and they refuse to accept or even acknowledge that you have a justifiable argument. Aggravating? Sure. Impossible? Maybe. Can it be overcome? Egh....therein lies the problem.
When are the opinions we hold so correct that we can't even accept that they are being challenged? And what are we supposed to do when we would rather smack someone in the face then listen to their dribble for another second? I personally have a problem with this. I really have to step outside of my mind and realize that someone might, (might being the keyword here) be right. But *gasp* that would mean that I was wrong.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
I'm going to be frank
Sometimes things seem to get me down for no reason. It's very odd, semi-off putting, and all around weird. Does anyone else get that? You'll be strolling through the television channels and some poor, heart-wrenching story about the local SPCA's seasonal influx of cats comes across, and bam! Gone down some depressing, "I wish I could take home all the kitties" walk. That of course turns into something about just wishing you could do something, which in turns gives way to question all sorts of other things. Its a vicious cycle, and one that I have apparently perfected since it seems to happen to me more often than I care to admit to.
Maybe it's my particular brand of crazy that allows me to go down these rugged terrains of mental instability. And by the way, I do often refer to myself as having a particular brand of crazy. Dug thinks its funny. And so do I. So there.
Maybe it's my particular brand of crazy that allows me to go down these rugged terrains of mental instability. And by the way, I do often refer to myself as having a particular brand of crazy. Dug thinks its funny. And so do I. So there.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Apparently The Cool Kids Are Doing It
I've never forayed into blogging before, save a few random posts on a work related blog. I'm not sure if I'm way behind on the curve, or if I'm just so cool I'm to far ahead to even consider a blog. However, after spending the majority of my computer-related hours jumping around from blog to blog, I've decided to start my own. So here I am internets.
They say that a major life change will ripple out into other smaller life changes. If that true, then I consider this to be one of those changes. I quit my job on Monday. It was a good job, paid the bills, offered me comfort, and was relatively easy. But it wasn't what I wanted, it drove me crazy. So I quit to pursue something that I really like. Not quite sure what that is yet, however I'm sure that I will be filling the time between complete mental breakdown (i.e. quitting a perfectly good job) and nirvana (finding something I love) with waiting tables. Which actually, I really enjoy despite the general unattractiveness of the profession.
I suppose that time is the ultimate factor in this one. We shall see where it goes, and how the river flows, and all of those other good things. And you know, now that I'm reading over this, I feel like maybe I should have introduced myself. Is that blogging appropo? I think I'm going to buck the system. Eventually the details will come to light I'm sure.
Untill then!
They say that a major life change will ripple out into other smaller life changes. If that true, then I consider this to be one of those changes. I quit my job on Monday. It was a good job, paid the bills, offered me comfort, and was relatively easy. But it wasn't what I wanted, it drove me crazy. So I quit to pursue something that I really like. Not quite sure what that is yet, however I'm sure that I will be filling the time between complete mental breakdown (i.e. quitting a perfectly good job) and nirvana (finding something I love) with waiting tables. Which actually, I really enjoy despite the general unattractiveness of the profession.
I suppose that time is the ultimate factor in this one. We shall see where it goes, and how the river flows, and all of those other good things. And you know, now that I'm reading over this, I feel like maybe I should have introduced myself. Is that blogging appropo? I think I'm going to buck the system. Eventually the details will come to light I'm sure.
Untill then!
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